Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Sweet. Baby. Jeebus. Iss HoT!

(Image from some freak named "magentafreak". She's on Deviant Art. Go buy her evil sun!)

I don't really know how it's already 7 o'clock right now, but alas, it is. I thought I got home at like 5:30? Then showered? Which, showers only take me, at the most, (like, we're talking, I'd have to have some major pre-quarter life crisis that I'd be mulling over here,) at most a half hour...So that gets me to 6....wtf 7? W.T.F.

In other news, I have had an eye twitch all day that appears to have calmed the fuck down, so that's good (though I think it has started in the other eye, now?) Thanks, weird stress responses of the body. Where are the anti-eye twitch meds at the Rite Aid Pharmacy, for serious? I'd so take one right now. Here's to hoping a balanced meal of coffee and pizza will somehow make this issue go away.

I've also got a lovely headache coming on too, so that's fun.

Did I mention I work outside/ in a stuffy, non-A/C warehouse in this weather? Makes a girl want to cry a little.
Sweaty, salty tears that would leave streaks of white on my face as they rolled down my cheeks,
Where there was once a layer of (sexy) dirt, spray paint residue, and general filth.

I also get the feeling like I am going to hurl/pass out when I come home, which is, needless to say, also good news.

And perhaps the best/ sexiest news: Part of my summer uniform contains one of the hottest summer trends. I mean you have to get yourself some of these or else you would be doing yourself a major disservice.

What trend am I talking about?
Why, mom shorts, of course!
What are mom shorts, you ask?
Why, they are like mom jeans, naturally, only shorts!
What are mom jeans you ask?
WHAT?! You don't know what mom jeans are??
Here's a link to a song my friend Andy and I did in '08 about MJs that might help clear that up for you.


Apparently I don't know how to make that link click-able.
Sad how limited my knowledge of the intranets is considering how much I'm on it.
And how I had an online journalism class.
And how there's a "link" button at the top of the page that I tried, but the link just turns invisible when I view my post.


Ok, back. This is some honest to goodness good tastin' pizza. Could've used another minute in the ov3n, maybe.
Also not crazy about Tombstone pepperoni. Pepperoni in general is kinda Eh. I mean, what good would the Peps be if pizza didn't exist? Not much, not much at all.

Although it's a different story for you over there, isn't it, Pepperoni Eater? You're one of those weirdos that eats them from packages, aren't you? Well it's wrong, wrong I tell you. (Upon further research there are apparently Pepperoni Cubes, too? Sick. You know what those would be called if you took away the "epperoni" and "c"? Pubes.)

Anywho, I will include a visual of the trendy (they are trendy, keep in mind,) MS's once I have the energy to do anything more than strike a couple keys (or in some cases weird, keyless areas of my laptop where keys once were, but a certain feline- AHEM,MARLOW, HOW RUDE!- decided they aren't needed for typing, and would instead make for some delightful play-thingys.)

Other things I am capable of doing: Sipping on some Maxwell House, and shoving down some Tombstone pizza. These are the only things I want to do right now. Not add a picture of my butt that looks like the butt of a 40-year-old woman (one who is not Demi Moore,) due to pocket placement, length, and an overall baggy fit.

Meanwhile, all this writin' has me feelin' better already! Sorta. Still slightly cranky though. Ex: I just yelled "MARLOW, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" at my cat since I heard a big thud in the kitchen.
Which I am realizing may have just been him jumping off the counter.
Do you see why I'm afraid to have kids?

I'm nice though. I swear. Just don't have patience for thuds. Or my dad smoking. Or boys. Or heat. Or......I'm gonna go now, bye guys! XX

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